a journey of fearless vulnerability

About

Diary Of A Polyamorous Black Girl

a journey of fearless vulnerability

About

The Photos

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It was so great to share the stage and have such a powerful conversation with these wonderful people. Thankful I was able to be apart of “Black People Being Honest : A conversation on polyamory ; monogamy and black love”
#polyamory #monogamy #blacklove

I’ve had an exceptionally hard week. All my planning into a few different things proved to all be for not in what felt like a matter of seconds. My living situation got a lot more complicated and unstable. Insomnia started to rear its ugly little head. I’m already behind on my readings at school because of the other life complications..Aaaand I’m breaking out —- So, this week has really sucked. ⁣
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I usually fight against difficult things by pretending they aren’t happening. I push through, I work harder, I ignore them and tell myself everything is fine. I decided not to do that this week. I decided to acknowledge all the things that were happening. Tell myself they aren’t okay, because they aren’t. And I decided to let myself hurt. I cried a lot. I drank a lot. And I smoked a lot. And embraced every drop of disappointment i felt for everything that has gone wrong. And last night, I finally slept. ⁣
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I think something really important happens when you allow yourself to hurt. When you acknowledge the bad things are happening and let yourself feel the natural emotions that go along with bad things happening. You get to be. You are full. A whole person. ⁣

I’ve deprived myself of so many feelings for a long time because I thought I had no right to feel them. That there wasn’t any time to feel them. That I would be less than for feeling them. And I’m realizing that is total bullshit. Bullshit mostly told to girls and women ( but that’s for another post) ⁣
Anyway, I still feel a little crappy but I feel better than I did when this week first began and I give thanks to myself for giving myself the space to feel all my feelings—I think 2019 actually might be kinda cool. ⁣
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#wellness #blackgirls #mentalheath #polyamblkgrl

it’s a put your chin in your coffee type of day. And I don’t mean that metaphorically, it actually happened. the lid of my nifty lens mug miraculously unscrewed itself and my giant alien head exhausted from being up since the crack of dawn, writing and exercising fell from its usually upright poised position and my chin literally fell into my coffee. I mean I’m not really complaining, I am a coffee freak but I just wonder if my chin chilling in coffee is foreshadowing something about my day today 🤔#polyamblkgrl #backtoschool #morningcoffee

first selfie of 2019 in my favourite sweater. working on my blog. trying to finish the manuscript for my book. filming videos for IGTV. counting down the days till i graduate and become a travelling nomad. and sending love to all black girls who are never protected and never believed. this year feels the same as the others but also very different.
#blackgirls #polyamorous #academics #filmmakers #writers #dreamers #polyamblkgrl

I think I’ve said it before on here but I struggle a lot with loving my face and my body and how I look in general. In this past year I’ve completely prioritized falling in love with my body through positive morning conversations with my self; staring at myself; establishing solid boundaries with people who don’t make me feel awesome; exercise and a fire skin routine. Although I can’t say I’m fully in love with my body yet I’m happy to report that the kid has been taking selfies and will be posting selfies on the regular —- you know what you call that? Growth! 🤙🏿

I hate being photographed 📸 @sirnoahbility

“Bad Alicia. Bad” 📷 & caption by : @sirnoahbility

'the victim who is able to articulate the situation of the victim has ceased to be a victim: he or she has become a threat.' - james baldwin

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